Thursday, 1 January 2009

New Year Reflections

So, it is 2009 and Happy New Year to you all!

I have wanted to blog for a while now but either not had the time or, when I have, I have been too knackered to write anything! I am sure you know how it goes....So 2009 and, for me, New Year's Day brings back the memories of the last year (and indeed year's since gone) and brings forward thoughts of the New Year to come. This year my New Years Eve was quietly lovely. And, whilst I went to bed at 10.30 last night, I was safe in the knowledge that I would be woken at midnight. Fireworks, singing and all kinds of drunken revellery abound round our way!

So I was able to welcome in the New Year at the appropriate time! *Bangs* *Whooshes* *Weeeeee's* were aplenty up my end and I am not taking dirty here people so put away those sewer like minds and thoughts!

That said, and 'drunken firework setting alight hair on fire celebrations' aside, once I was awake I found it hard to get back to sleep. I spent a couple of sad hours fretting about what has gone by and what is to come. It is often one of my 'things'. It can be the New Year or same old night. Lying awake in the wee hours worrying, sometimes crying, rarely laughing and a kind of 'long dark tea-time of the soul' wee hours feeling we all may have had.!

But have no worries for lickle me! It doesn't happen too often and tis but the night hours and the moon calling that brings such a thoughtful yet disproportionately sad repose. By the time the sun peeps over the hill, I am feeling much enlivened and more able to switch on my invisible cloak which protects from such thoughts! (Shortly before they come and take me away..... *wobble wobble ramble ramble bleaurgh....*)

Anyway, where was I?? Waffling in the New Year I think! Yes, I just wanted to recap on a year that started on 25th December 2007 with a rune reading which I did, in fact, blog about.
2007 and 2008 have been years of such tremendous changes, upheavals, sadness, happiness, confusion and clarity. All lumped together with a dash of uncertainty, a pinch of guilt and a cupful of determination and resolve. The end of 2007 found myself 'celebrating' Christmas and New Year alone, uncertain of the future and, probably, a stone lighter in weight (one positive there I think!)

So, twas on Christmas 2007 I did the rune reading which can be seen here Rune Reading So, what was the significance? If Any? Well, as I say in that blog, there was a great upheaval for all concerned, secrets had come to light but, as Ing the final rune cast said a time for looking forward to a new beginning. This has happened and, completing a circle of a year from then to now, the beginning has started. However, I feel that I am only at the VERY beginning of that wheel and uncertainty and the overcoming of many obstacles, for me anyway, still prevails.

I suppose that is what life is about.

We can never be sure what is around the corner, what is waiting to jump out at us, waiting to hurt or heal us, waiting to make us smile and laugh or cry and scream.

What will make us dance in 2009?
What will make us withdraw?
Who or what willl come into our lives tomorrow? Next week? Next month?
Who or what will make us sit up, take notice and move along a path never previously noticed? Who or what will leave our lives in a blaze of glory, sadness, regret or need? And all the while making us look back ..experiences, lessons learnt, wounds made and then healed loves lost and gained?

The only certainty is that such things are certain. They are essential parts of life and the cycle of life. They help us move onward, forward and develop.

If anything comes your way in 2009 and it makes you sit up, take notice and think 'I wonder..' this is usually because we are meant to 'wonder'. Do exactly that 'take notice' and move forward.

On a final note (and speaking of moving forward!) has ANYONE read The Idiot by Dostoevsky? If so, did they actually finish it? And if they did finish it, were they still alive by the end of it?! I am reading it and, to a degree, enjoying it, but blimey I think 2009 will be beset by this book!!

Anyway peace, love, blessings and hot banana's to you all!